The Washington PostDemocracy Dies in Darkness

Carolyn Hax: Dad tells son that no ‘real man’ wants to go to a baby shower

(Nick Galifianakis for The Washington Post)
3 min

Adapted from an online discussion.

Dear Carolyn: My wife and I are expecting our first baby. The baby shower is next weekend, and I was really looking forward to it. My dad wants to plan something for the guys to do that day. He was shocked when I said I was going to the baby shower. He said that no “real man” wants to go to a baby shower and that I’d be miserable at a “girly baby party.”

I think that’s nuts; I want to see the gifts for our son and celebrate the new baby. My dad won’t back down. He went on a rant about this generation of men letting our wives “feminize” us and how it’s ruining society and if I do this he’s going to feel as if he failed as a father. My wife has nothing to do with me wanting to be there, but he won’t listen.

I don’t know whether this is a hill I want to die on, but I also think I’d regret missing our baby shower just because my dad is being an idiot. What should I do?

— Not “A Real Man”

Not “A Real Man”: Amazing how much propaganda has seeped into family connections. Amazing, horrifying and sad.

I’m sorry your dad has lost it. You don’t have to keep arguing with him, though. His question was asked and answered: “Thanks, Dad, but I’ll be at the shower.”

The! End!

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